just girls.

snow jaded dragon.

2005-07-02T04:20:00.000-07:00

-snow jaded dragon.

we can fly!

2005-07-01T08:50:00.000-07:00

we were meant to fly!

a few snaps.

2005-06-23T20:50:00.000-07:00

i cant find my usb. but heres a few pic from aisha's cam. =)

err, wheels from an old town (?). snow jaded dragon. some river?
this should be the longest river in china. black pool dragon. the view from the elephant hill.

hah. hah.

3 more days to school.
shudder.

d.

china, baby!

2005-06-23T20:29:00.000-07:00

hah alright. i have no time to talk bout china today, cause i have to do homework. (haha yeah right, more like im too bloody lazy. ) but im gonna copy whot i wrote for lj!

it all started when the dark sky turned a light shade of blue. highliting a few ups and downs wont do justice to this trip. we flew over the fluffly clouds and 7 colors. greeted first by the cool wind that stroked our anxiety. the brightness stunned us, but it settled in. indeed, it really was a whole new world, although only a 4 hours flight. a world where the summer rain wields its brush and painted a snowy jaded dragon, a green elephant with a pagoda balanced on its trunk, friendly colorful dots and burgundy muddy huts.

where fat dark women are beautiful and skinny old men are strong. where people kneeled for rain and slaved to their crops. blasted chirpy firecrackers and multi-colored fireworks. in poverty, but my goodness. their welcoming faces. and such serenity i never knew existed. they had nothing to give but smiles and gratitude. i was amazed at the simplicity of the locals'. tendrils reaching out for souls as we farmed. the kids... sigh. oh my good god, ive lived my past 16 years in such idiocy.

doesnt take the courage of a hero, but the will to get my fucking wobbly pair of legs to take another step, which might as well have been my very step to death, further down following the tiger's leap. we got closer and closer to the many shades of green that seemed so lyrical. waterfalls rhymed down the gorge and rivers whispered harsh secrets as they passed. the chill was magnified that we reflexively hugged our handbook like the bible (as holy as the yellow pages, gees. *rolls eyes). beautiful alliteration of flowers. and we climbed back up, dead tired, but the dappled sunrays ignited every senses. the blind has been refined.

and when it ended (again it surprises you by how fast everything does) you always feel detached and not quite yet prepared for reality. shangrila- which means the idyllic place in your heart. ive found mine in lijiang >_<. heh.

the end. of another time frame.

"and in memories we will be rich" -mr tan. ytss principal. the wise wise man i admire!

-diyyannnaa.

2005-05-18T07:34:00.000-07:00

I’ve realized…

I realized tt just lyk how people tink ur life is perfect, u think they lead charmed lives.

I realized tt it is so much easier living without sumthin. But it so much harder when u have tt sumthin n u have to part wif it. It’s so much harder to let it go. There’s juz too much that time cannot erase. I realize. I now knew how fortunate I wes.

I realized tt it is actually so hard to smile. Sumtimes u juz hafta fake it so tt otha plp won’t tink u’re arrogant. Sumtimes u juz hafta smile to make plp feel gd n to show tt u acknowledge their presence. It’s so hard to smile yet so easy to frown.

I realized tt u shld never easily trust a person. Yeah they may be nice n all. But they are never wad they appear to be. I realize tt I shld never judge people. Nt frm da way they dress, nt frm they way they speak, nt frm da way they act ard u. Who am I to judge neway?

I realized tt u will never be able to noe everything about a person. Not even ur own siblings. Somehow da onlie person u reallie noe…is u urself. People always say…”trust me I noe everything bout him” But hey no one in da werld noes everything bout another person.

I realized how books can actualie make u cry so much. I thought onlie movies had dat effect on us. But now I knew. After reading one child(which is a fantastic book) it wes as if I was da person whu cldn’t let da child go. It wes as if I wes da person whu saw all da injustice done to tt poor gerl. It wes as if tt wes ma werld. I’m glad its nt though. Coz I won’t be able to let go if I were her.

I realized tt frenz r da most important people in da werld. That day I knew da true meaning of a fren. I thought a fren wes someone whu lends u a shoulder to cry on. But actualie she is da person whu cries along wif u. Da same person whu shares ur sorrows and happiness. I treasure ma frenz. I love ma frenz. Especially da four of u. I’ll never forget u plp coz u left me wif so many great memories. I dunnoe if I can let u go when da time comes…

Nurul

Guess Who?

2005-04-16T17:49:00.000-07:00

Guess Who was absolutely beautiful. so friggin sweeeet la. it made my eyeballs perspire. heh. heh.
i want ashton kutcher! siiigh.

-diyy.

mondayy

2005-03-27T05:38:00.001-08:00

like the tranquil before a raging storm. you knoww, when almost everything seems so placid, so calm, so... normal. yet you know tomorrow youre gonna be be in a frenzy, youd feel the twitch in your legs like you need to run somewhere, anywhere, even the toilet would do. you can feel the teacher's hot breathing down your neck. a trickle of sweat. as you rush through your work, copying maybe, and thinking. Oh crap, its Monday.

-diyy.

school.

2005-03-24T21:04:00.000-08:00

school teaches me a lot of stuff.

school teaches me that its okay to be stupid.
school teaches me that youre going nowhere if you are stupid.
school teaches me how to sleep with my eyes opened.
school teaches me that using ankle socks means youre not disciplined.
school teaches me that good english is real important.
school teaches me its okay if your teacher speaks like an overaged ah-lian.
school teaches me how to elbow my way up a jammed staircase.
school teaches me how to handle the pain when someone elbows you in the chest during recess.
school teaches me that this is the year to burn midnight oil.
school teaches me that this is the year when enough sleep is abosulutely a must.

school is not that bad if you dont glance at the wrong places.
school is enriching. it teaches you loadsa stuff.
this is why you should go to school.

-diyy.

2005-03-09T06:41:00.000-08:00

happily-ever-after endings are feel-good shit. at first. somehow, it eventually leaves me feeling disgusted. thats why my favourite story as a child was 'The Pied Piper of Hamelin' and not 'Cinderella.'

buutt, that doesnt mean I dont want a happy ending. actually i dont.
i want a Happy-Zappy one.

ok the end.

aishaa

2005-03-02T04:14:00.000-08:00

When a girl is quiet,
Millions of things are running in her mind.
When a girl is not arguing,
She is thinking deeply.
When a girl looks at you with eyes full of questions,
She is wondering how long you will be around
When girl answers "I'm fine" after a few seconds,
She is not at all fine.
When a girl stares at you,
She is wondering why you are lying.
When a girl lays on your chest,
She is wishing for you to be hers forever.
When a girl calls you everyday,
She is seeking for your attention.
When a girl wants to see you everyday,
She wants to be pampered.
When a girl sms's you everyday
She wants you to reply at least once.
When a girl says I love you,
She means it.
When a girl says that she can't live without you.
She has made up her mind that you are her future.
When a girl says "I miss you",
No one in this world can miss you more than that.

2005-02-27T05:07:00.000-08:00

i had to wake up at 6 for school. on a sunday. the absurdity of it all is jaw-dropping.

at the end of the practice, they took so long to pack up that i got restless and decided to waste my time on the phone instead. i spent 30 cents to get myself locked up. in my own school. my friends must have thought i had already went off. so i was all by myself.

its not like anyone bothered to shout something like, "is there anyone else in there?" before locking the gates of hell. they should make it a tradition. just to double check.

i thought i was doomed. until i realized i could slip under the gate. but then i told myself, that was preposterous. i could get stuck and that would make everything so much worse.

its not like i had any other option. so i gave it a go, ignoring the tiny protests in my head. in a quite-swift-maneuver, i did it. i walked away, laughing at myself, feeling half dimwitted and half contented (that i was my own superheroine) at the same time.

now, if you see me tomorrow, do Not laugh at me.
(even if you do, im sure i'd prolly end up laughing along with you)

today was thee day i got locked up in my own school. no- the day 'nadiah turned 16' sounds so much more glamorous. Happy Birthday, my sweet=)

aisha

2005-02-26T04:54:00.000-08:00

a very pathetic saturday.

my parents ignore my pleas to go out for a decent movie with the girlfriends.

i've never felt this touched. thats how they show me they love me to no end.

now aisha, the taradiddle ends here.

2005-02-19T05:55:00.000-08:00

"they all tell a common story, a story which invariably starts with an endeavour, the spirit of trying, followed sometimes by the anguish of failure, the courage to perservere and finally leading to the ecstacy of ultimate triumph.

what is more uplifting than watching someone achieve his goal after some struggle? being that person, of course, and actually striving to achieve something you really want." -mr poh. =D

not that i have a crush on mr poh or anything like that of course. i agree with nurul that; that speech of his was. very. inspiring? and the only reason we have not been updating is because there's just too many common tests coming up. and we simply cannot find the time. oh forgive us, dear blog. excuses, excuses.

d.

2005-02-07T04:03:00.000-08:00

mr neo: "today, no homework!"

*waits for class to cheer madly*
(except we dont. he does it too often. these things get old. fast)

he gets pissed when we keep clicking our pens out of boredom. according to him, it causes rashes, which he cant show because hes got a big tattoo across his chest. he was rather wild when he was young, you see. but i think hes just so full of shit. and obvious lies. nevertheless, we dont hate him. at least i know i dont. he cracks me up.

anyway, anyway, anyway, more intriguingly, today, the canteen shutters were vandalized. with pretty wicked shit. some anti-jesus enthusiast sprayed something like 'jesus sucks' across the couple of shutters in black spray paint. cool eh. theres gonna be a ginormous hoo-ha over it tomorrow. definitely. i wonder which ballsy, but half-cocked soul did it. oohh the drama.

arent we all battling the urge to slaughter the school comittee? how can we ever get over the grim-ish reality that our school facilities are faarr from satisfactory. whats an air-conditioned hall when we dont even have soap in the soap dispenser or loo rolls in the loo-roll-holder?

oh aand we'll have Soo much fun tomorrow, watching the cny "concert" from the 2nd floor corridor=)
right.
something to look down on. literally.

aishaa

2005-02-02T04:34:00.000-08:00

From the light in my window he can see into me
But i cannot see him until he is close
Breathing, with a smile at my window
He comes to take me
Turn me round and round
Come out and play Come play
Lie still Lie still Lie still

Little rhymes and little songs
Pieces of the forest in my hair and clothes
Sometimes i see him near me
when i know he cant be there
Sometimes i feel him near me
when i know he cant be there
Sometimes i feel him near me
and i know it is something to just bear

When i call out
No one can hear me
When i whisper, he thinks the message
Is for him only
My little voice inside my throat
I always think there must be something
That i've done
Or something i can do
But no one comes to help
He says,
A little girl like you

im aching all over.so freakin tired.i need more sleep.

ainn

2005-02-01T22:13:00.000-08:00

Come to me in my dreams, and then
By day I shall be well again!
For then the night will more than pay
The hopeless longing of the day.

*braces self for february*
aisha

2005-01-22T19:27:00.000-08:00

(:we really should restore our blog from a depressed, inactive and unused state:)

I dont like 2005. its the 23rd day of january and im on the verge of giving up on trying to make things more worthy and pleasing.

a brief recap..
thursday i got sent home from school.
-a whole day's worth of education slip through my fingers due to the utter stupidity of the hods.

friday i was dragged out to visit my grandparents.
-butt most couldnt be bothered to reconcile. so why should i? their loss is my blessing.

saturday i was compelled to loiter in the 'comfort' of my own house for some maulut.
-spent the whole day with my neighbour and my worries of why im not killing myself with goddamn math.

and today, its gonna be me, my books, and the gloomiest, fucked-up-est sunday. yet. i suppose. with the fear of monday and what the next week would bring.
tests, lessons, teachers. yes, teachers, the people who deserve to burn in hell or rot to the lumpiest fragments of putrefying flesh.

wait, does that make sense?
aah i think im dead from the neck up. im exhibiting a lack of power to absorb anything.
excuse me while i try to recuperate.

fare you well.
aisha

2005-01-07T20:38:00.000-08:00

eyy, how come i can't make my font smaller now? geesh. anyways. it's a week too late to wish you people a happy new year now. so i shall just uh, ramble.

school's the same. i'm sitting next to sharifah, and i love watching the genius work even though she makes me feel so dumb and slow. and i always have to stand to see what the teacher is writting at the bottom of the whiteboard, cause she insists on putting XC and Ron, the tallest ones with the big heads up infront. but it's all good cause out of the corner of my eyes i can catch glimpses of someone who's worth glimpsing at =).

it's only the first week and it's already hectic. every day in class there's always a period of self-criticising, feeling disgust at my own Achille's heel and wearing failure like an uncomfortable, prickly turtleneck pullover. hopefully neurotic stays in trend for at least this entire stressful year. normally, i'm slow to anger. much too slow most of the times. but this week i've been so tired, and it has caught up with me. all the unexploited wrath exploded last night when i was trying to do a bit of homework when my lil siblings were making far too much noise arguing. they stopped and stared for a few moments, i guess they were just as shock as i was. SHUT THE FUCK UP! sounded foreign even to me. oohoo. but i love it. the way they actually did keep quiet for a whole minute. i've never gotten that much respect from them, i really should go shut the fuck up more often. hums. and being the person that has always been satisfied with a pass, i really dont push myself enough. btw btw, out of all the people who set high goals for themselves, 83% are prepared to fail. that means by not setting a goal for myself i'm saving myself from an expected failure. oh im so wise.

hah and yesterday, we tried out dragon boat. we went all the way back with our wet attire. and oddly i didn't feel cold at all. but the water seemed to have soaked through ain's outwear, underwear and all the way to her bones that she shivered all the way back. so cute. (hah, ain. underwear. evil laughter.)

oh and you can add me to your anti-cheng club. i don't really hate hate her. but i just don't see how someone like her who doesn't even plan her speeches can be a principal. i don't use absofuckinglutely-dull-and-nonsensical. but if i do use that description, it would be on her.

5 ways to torture her.

1. ask her to use knee-high socks.
2. tape her 2 miles-long dreary speeches and force her to listen to herself. (oh my
this is too evil. i love it.)
3. dye her fringe white like Ms Jumia's. so style.
4. put her in a ring with mr ow. like you know the celebrity death match thinggy.
5. you fill this up

okay bye bye. to a smarter, saner new year.
Diy T. Layzie.

deee aishaaa looves youu tooo

2004-12-21T01:01:00.000-08:00

i.felt.like.killing.each.and.every.one.of.my.girlfriends.

only when none of them seemed to recall a particular momentous date on their calendars, a.k.a. my birthday.

But of course, Im Just Kidding.

Because they Did remember. they were merely pretending. my sweeet friends. i actually Fell for it.

and i still am ashamed at myself.. for allowing my leg to be yanked in such a way.
now they have the pride in knowing they accomplished what they intended to do.

forget that.

yesterday was fun. while it lasted.
describing it with words would have spoilt its true meaning.
so there.

i was not unhappy.

even the fucked front row seats in the cinema couldn't evaporate the hysteria that had been lifting my spirits.

all in all, i have a confession. i love my friends. soo fucking much.

they help make the notion of being one of the last to turn fifteen, and eventually get an ic among the peers not such a bad thing after all.thanks=>

so. they say that we know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is, not to be reminded of it.
really?
eventhough birthdays can be really fun?

xoxo
aishaa

aishaaa dee loves you. <3

2004-12-20T23:08:00.001-08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AISHA DARLING!!! WE LOOVEEE YOUUUU. ATTACKS AISHA WITH HUGS AND KISSES.

you're our sweetie pie. our pot filled of gold on the other side of the rainbow, and... and... oh there's no point trying to express our love, cause you are just much much more! <3 hums dee dums. it has been proven that the one with the most birthdays lives the longest. bahh. =)

_insert witty title here_

2004-12-15T01:38:00.000-08:00

_insert witty title here_

there are 5 of us here. but it looks like none of us can be bothered to blog. we thought it will be cute, when we are much older, we ll come back to this site and read back our dumb entries, and laugh at our ugly photos. looks like we ll have nothing much here which will jog our memory of our secondary school days eh. so uh, let me try to blog bout. pause. nothing.

so, hums, ive not been doing anything much. just wasting valuable time on the computer, reading, wasting my money, eating a bit, trying to sleep- and all that all over again. this is, My December. pathetic, neh? so when we decided to start back our weekly routine of going to the gym, then jumping into the pool, i thought my heart is gonna explode. but it wasnt that bad, gym was dreary (alright, my opinion on this would probably conflict with ains), but swimming was pleasurable! it must be our awful luck though, that every time we go swimming, some under-aged shrimps try to pick us up. i found them fugly things shriveled up in their tiny swimming trunks highly amusing. ain forbid me from even smiling, in case they got the wrong impression. aisha looked like she could have stabbed them with my whole collection of black inked pens. they did become even more annoying when they started to tail us. fortunately for them, the earth is round, and not flat. or else we wouldve pushed em off.

oh. and yesterday, my silly friend ripped of the smarties plastic packaging. so we had to carry smarties in our palms. then there was this prune-liked looking woman who gave us funny looks. she finally decided to come to us and asked, why are you girls eating so many birth control pills. our sides split. hoho, so now we know how birth control pills look like ey? pale and colourful- like smarties! (Only smarties have the answer.=))

Peering into my crystal ball, I see (pause and look closer) tons of gifts on Christmas. hint hint.
-d.

fujiicepalace

2004-11-30T01:18:00.000-08:00

fujiicepalace. noticetheirwetjeans? hoho.

-d.

clarke quay.

2004-11-29T04:05:00.000-08:00

some of the fucken cool figurines we saw.

our gingerbread man. which tasted really like ginger- yech.

drenched-satisfied-shoppers.

2004-11-27T06:44:00.000-08:00

ooh camp. the last camp =(. i love camps. i love fiesty fanatics (their group name is not dumb, just in case silly you think it is =X).

shall say no further bout the camp.

blogging is getting outta fashion. nyahaha. but really, we all want our unspoken opinions, silent screams, random rambles to be heard. we wanna be heard? now now, you don't deny. ooh i'm chewing on bitter-sweet gum i gt from farah. funny eh? to be bitter, yet sweet? oh maybe it's like, like if things get bitter between us you'll still be my sweetie? you... you wanna be my sweetie? mehh.

-diyy.

2004-11-27T01:50:00.000-08:00

-ain

2004-11-19T02:08:00.000-08:00

181104- a date to remember. kecoh but fun.

more to come...

2004-11-19T02:01:00.000-08:00

3e4

me & rhadji

i miss 3e4 oready

ain

geylang blues

2004-11-11T04:40:00.000-08:00

i will never like geylang. not even if ashton kutcher, bad religion, or the most kick-ass bands live there. not even if it rains all day long. not even if a kebegillion spearmint chewing gum fall from the sky. not even if the place is bursting with eye candy. not even if everything there goes free. and definately not even if it teaches me to think like how a rational person would. and i actually got some stuff from there. the irony.

aisha

This too Shall Pass

2004-11-08T16:52:00.000-08:00

A woman lost her last living relative to old age, and she was devastated. She went to a wise man and asked him if he could bring her relative back to life. He told her he could, but he needed to make a special potion and she must bring him the ingredients. She eagerly agreed. He listed strange ingredients, all of which she brought back faithfully.

Finally, he said, "The last thing you must bring to me is a grain of rice from a family that has suffered no losses and has lived in constant happiness." The woman eagerly set off to look for such a family. It sounded easy enough to her. She looked in all the houses in the village and the surrounding villages , but found no one who could help her. "I must leave no stone unturned," she thought. She traveled across the world and asked at every house, but found no family that fit the wise man's description.

Finally, exhausted and discouraged, she returned to her village and told the wise man, "There is no family in the world that has not lost a dear one. Please, tell me there is another way to complete the potion." The wise man replied, "Not one family in the world has escaped the pain of losing a loved one. The potion cannot be made. All families have suffered like you do now, and their pain has passed. So will yours."

some story this is. that silly, silly woman. but then again, the loss of a loved one may lead someone to do the silliest things.

have a fab day.

aisha

2004-11-05T22:08:00.000-08:00

You ask me why I change the color of my hair yeah
You ask me why I need thirty two pairs of shoes to wear
You seem to ask me why I got a lot of things it’s just a chick thing
You ought to let it go and try to understand but you don’t have a clue…
Thats what girls do
They keep you guessing the whole day through
Play your emotions push all your buttons its true
Thats what girls do
You ask me why I gotta play so hard to get yeah
You ask me do I play it cool just to make you sweat yeah
You want some kind explanation I can give
Its just a chick thing that youre messin with
To me its black and and white
But to you its not getting through to you…
Thats what girls do
They keep you guessing the whole day through
Play your emotions push all your buttons its true
Thats what girls do
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah, why should I change?
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah, Im havin to much fun.
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah, to you it’s confusing
To me its nothing new……
Thats what girls do
Thats what girls do
They keep you guessing the whole day through
Play your emotions push all your buttons it’s true
Thats what girls…
Thats what girls do
They keep you guessing the whole day through
Play your emotions push all your buttons its true
Thats what girls do
Thats what girls do
They keep you guessing the whole day through
Play all your emotions push all your buttons its true
Thats what girls do
Thats what girls do
Thats what girls go
Girls
You ask me why I change the color of my hair yeah

hoohoohoo. tell me what can be more irritating than having your computer restart in a middle of a long entry.
sheesh. to cut the long story short, and to update in this blog so that it will not appear abandoned, i have been insanely stupid, happy and oblivious. been wasting every precious second through out the holiday. pure bliss i say!

and why is that i have not seen aisha, nurul and fi at all. are you guys telling me that you guys don't miss?
hold on, i was not really looking for an answer, do not answer that.

d.

2004-11-01T19:46:00.000-08:00

I've got to be honest with you Bill. I really think you're wasting your money. Your son has no natural ability. He holds the racquet like a dead man. He's no Agassi. One day he may hit the ball. But he'll never be number one.

.....only hear the good stuff. hee i like that advertistment.

ah beautiful morning.

*soaks in sunrays*

d.

hatred to love

2004-10-31T18:24:00.002-08:00

the idea of sec 3 never fascinated or excited me. as far as i was concerned, i wanted to be stuck in 2003.fullstop. i wanted so much to cling on and hug the earth soo tightly to deprive it of further rotation by any chance. i guess the reality is, i dont possess such superbeing powers. im not strong enough, wait, im not even big enough.

but its true when they say that at this age, mindsets and such change over time. this year brought even more justice to that fact.

i was totally alien to my new class. there were only 7 of 'our kind.' the others were either mandarin speaking, sepet, techno buffs or plainly chinese.

that was how i was welcomed into my third year of secondary education. the word school no longer existed to me. it would be more of a lie than a shame to call that torture chamber 'school.' my class was hell with florescent lighting.

but its better to light a candle than to curse the darkness isnt it? i have two whole years to love my school dont i?

i learned to accept.
the people in my class can be all that. in fact they are, and they are so much more. maybe a little too much more. as soon as we got to know each other better, our noise level hit a possible 110 decibels. field trips only tightened our bond further and improvised it into something almost unbreakable. knowing that i was going to stay with this class for another year allowed the feeling of comfort to overcome me.
actually, i was way off. next year would not be the same. not without two of the 3e3-ers who wont be with us. such big losses. take it with a pinch of salt.
it all takes a little of getting used to. trying to cope, not complain about changes does the trick. of course little teeney-weeny complains here and there are inevitable but thats besides the point.

i think.. the glass is not half empty or half full, for that matter. its just.. twice as large as it needs to be. ha-di-haha. balls.

happy zappy holidays
&
happy halloween
muah hahaha
xoxo
aisha

make it snappy

2004-10-29T23:22:00.000-07:00

oh kay sec 3 has been wonderful. mind blowing. time flies so quickly we're sitting fer our o's nxt yr. shudder. the last day of school was amazing but sad as well. i feel sorry fer those who got retained. yes sec 3 has been the most slackiest year of my entire life. oh well i'll miss them. enjoy ur holidays everyone. be good. dun miss me;p

dying of boredom
ainn

tp.

2004-10-26T04:41:00.000-07:00

enjoyable. love. blood. prick. bubbles. danial. is. super. fine.
thank. god. we. went. for. the. blood. course. rather. than. the.
starch. bull. hoho. the. net. they. had. to. use. is. super. fugly.
and. admit. it. we. looked. pretty. smart. in. a. labcoat.

but actually, if stupidity is personified, i'll be it. sighs.

diyy

2004-10-16T21:06:00.000-07:00

okay. this is the only picture left after my com has been reset-ed.

.

2004-10-15T03:44:00.000-07:00

regret. no, no i don't regret just lapse of good judgement.
exams. sighs. i think i'm so tired of it that i'm even too tired to lift the pen.
drown in the words FUCK IT written in black against the ugly painted blue desk. duration is a relative.
i often feel the urge to pour more sand into the hourglass. but then i found myself stuck in the middle of the hourglass itself. i've lost track of where friendship ends and falling begins. and really the only thing which is stopping me is air. I'll jut my attention into a fake conversation. Juvenille in my avoidance. No, i wasn't observing you from the corner of my eyes. Before i get even more lost, i shall stop. this. if this sounds so jumbled up and it doesn't make sense. that's cause it's my thoughts. all. in. a. rumble.

so... how many times do i use the word I. damn im selfish.

row row row your boat, even if it sinks.

d.

everytime i pin down what i think i want, it slithers away. pffbt.

2004-10-06T05:18:00.000-07:00

everytime i pin down what i think i want, it slithers away. pffbt.

We human are never contented (yes, you've heard this before). We tend to desire for that thing we do not have. It's brushing our fingertips yet, so distant. Almost elusive- the unreachable. But they say nothing is unreachble (yes, i know, i know you've heard this too). Well, shut up. Don't you dare pass that bloody phrase to me. I'm gonna tickle your tongue with a knife if you do. And i swear, i tickle good. It just can't stand because we all know the defination of unreachable. No expectations, no let downs- simple. As I grow even older it gets even more difficult to believe. Not that i don't want to,but because too much has happened.I just can't.

diy.

i was bored

2004-10-02T21:11:00.000-07:00

like they say, 'the pasture is always greener on the other side'. i used to playact as grown-ups as i cld not wait to grow up.butt now that i am on the verge of entering this world, i am plagued by worries of growing up. from the snug window of my youth, the world of adults seems to be a jungle where only the fittest will survive and i wonder if im fit enough to survive the rat race of this world.

will i make it in the paper chase to equip myself with the all-important degree scroll which wld give me the edge to the working world?

im very happy to stay the way i am. at this current age. this phase. right now. its scary wen u think abt growing up. i shudder. we'll lose our old frends. not gonna be in the same uni. diff courses. ur frends are gonna change. the thought of leaving s'pore to further studies? brrr. like diy said, they will fade. there's not enough tyme n stuffs. n wen u meet after mths or years, we myte nt even have anytin to tok abt. feel awkward.

your frens WILL change.even if we wont ferget our old ones. we WILL have new ones. so need to balance quite abit. we myte prefer our new frends. we jus change taste dun we?
its nt like we forget our old friends. we r just wayy closer with our new ones like she said. im jez sayin, it will fade. gasps.

i have to say this. i love each n everyone of u to bits. yes i dig u guys. bah im gettin emotional.
n el paper was like shit. n its ONLY el. gawd.

happy studying everyone.
ain

2004-09-25T19:42:00.000-07:00

looks like no one has been updating. prolly cause everyone's been pretty caught up.
hmms. pretty scarie the way time moves faster and faster. of course i'm not expecting it to pause, turn around and ask how well we are catching up. butt seriously. everything and everyone seems to be in such a rush. really hate myself for not being able to catch up.

oh btw. yest wa Nuruls and Fahmi's bday.
Happy B'day Darlings!

oh. i finallyy watched "meraung" the show which everyyyonee has been talking about. not bad, not bad at all.

sigh. i don't feel like saying anything else. i don't feel. okay i've been a deadpan. and i don't mind it at all. and the reason i'm feeling so empty. and my heart is such a void. is. because. of. you. living a lie is a silent suicide. bahh. kay it's better not to feel.

snap.snap. whee. girl's fun. dunt ask.

diyy

2004-09-18T20:20:00.000-07:00

its been over a week. i cant believe it.
i actually miss obs.
it angers me that time flies soo fast.
before any of us know it, we'd be sitting for finals for the year.
i cant wait for exams to be over but i can wait for exams to come.
oh bugger.

xoxo
aisha

OBS!

2004-09-10T02:57:00.000-07:00

Omg. Omg. Omg. I have no idea where to start, like seriously. OBS was fucken awesome. Hack no, my group MARCO POLO (Sam, Cindy, Feros, Lina, Khairel, Sharif, Val, LJ, WJ, Thahirah, Indi, Mattie, Zack, Alif, Safwan, Ridhwan, Ernie and maself) kicks ass. Hoot. We got the mobile course, it was rad! We rule. I love all the 16 of em. I can't exactly recall what really happened, but i tell ya, it's fabulous. Simply doozie. To narrow down to just a few activities will be cruel, but I have to since i'm shagged right now.

(In no particular order.)

- The first highly coloured surprise that all of them are so hyped. All was chipping in, and working suprisingly well.

- "Marco Polo Ready? Maro Polo Pull!"

- Sleeping at the beach front. Our first dinner. The rice was superb; heh credits to Sharif. Actually the whole time, the food was quite well done.

- Hiking drained our energy, but heck it was great fun. The bag was packed and terribly heavy. Tripped. Reached the next campsite in the shortest time of 25 min. *coughs* Yes, we have great leaders and they can read the map real well. High elements and all. Fuck we were noisy, especially Thahirah. Heh. Slept at the other camp site.

-More hiking, even more fun. Our DJ was rather drained so we got throaty songs *giggles*.

-Pitched our tent at a real densed spot. Had around 3 hours to spare at night. Spent time talking cock and laughing our ass off. Fell in love even more deeply with my groupmates.

- Argued with a stranger when i was changing in the tent. Went out to realize it was this cute guy. Damn. Havoc 0. Screams!

-Kayaked with Feros for extremely long hours. That guy is such a hilarious asshole.

-Stopped for lunch break on an island. Decided to float around in the sea and eat instead. Heh fucking cool. Floating around with your life jacket is the best way to have lunch. Yumms.

-Sharif scratching. Scratching. Scratching. Prickly Heat!

-Us trying to capsize each other. Bump Boat!! Giggles.

- A fish jumping into Lina's kayak. Me and Feros rushed over to her kayak which she was sharing with Khairel. She was screaming. I told her I'm gonna save her and get the fish out.
Instead I went,"OMG the fish so big!"
Heh, so Feros helped instead. You've got to be there it was side-splitting.

- Jetty Jump. Twice. Alif aka SWEET GUYYYY fears water. We managed to motivate him til he got down. He was so touched. He got teary. Big Hug. We all got teary. *sniffs sniffs*

-We made our own mini campfire in the middle of our 5 tents. We didn't go in even though it was already pass lights out. LAST NIGHT! sobs!

-Had to do this tunnel thing. We couldn't see a single thing. All were holding hands and squeezing each other's palms. Scarie. It was pitch black. No torch. Just us and the forest. Had to use our sense of hearing. A new experience.

-Washing tents and stuff. Got wet. Heh, more fun! yay!

- Last sad goodbyes. Hugs.

sighs. kay click HERE for more.

I totally love OBS. I love Marco Polo even more.
MP lover,
Diyy

i smile an empty smile

2004-09-06T01:18:00.000-07:00

there use to be a smile,
that was pure and true,
but now, it’s juz empty.
a smile to make others happy
but it’s also a mask,
to shield u from them,
and them from u.
a smile put on to hide,
to hide from pain, anger and sorrow.
a smile to lift up others,
while sacrificing urself needlessly.
an empty smile without joy,
without care and love

I smile an empty smile.
Nurul

september holidays.

2004-09-05T07:35:00.000-07:00

Hee. It's as if i have awfully hyper-active rabbits in my stomach! a mix of skittish, nervousness, excitement, stomach cramp and a pinch of jittery = not such a nice feeling. yummms.

OBS from monday to friday. whee. omg omg. i can't really speak. i need to jump and run around til i wear myself out, then prolly i can fall asleep then. it has always been tough to fall asleep a night before camp. almost impossible! tsk.

erms. i decided against the idea of bringing the bag i used fer the bintan expedition, since it's embarrasingly HUGE. gonna use the op sling bag, which is actually still rather big. no actually it's terribly fat. and i still yet to finish packing! oh wells. but it's better than the hiking bag, least i won't lose my balance. giggles. remember the bintan thinggy guys? ;)

erms. today was immensely "nonsensical". couldn't stop laughing. yesterday we did our mt project. i never knew that afiq is insanely comical. had fun acting as if i was possessed. but felt totally awkward when they told me i was scary and refused to look me in the eye *pouts*. heh, riight.

they say that we are going to be grouped randomly with the pupils from different schools. unnerving. what if there's a girl prettier than i am in the group? hah, joking!! seriously, what if there's a bitch who's going to make the 5 days a living hell. what if my group is soo non-enthu and they are so boring? what if there's a total cute guy in the group, and he sees me in my utter most worst?! oh gawwd.

herms, this year has been packed with camps. wonderfool. since i doubt we'll have much chance to camp next year. darn it, i have not touched a single homework. won't be much time to revise either. so you people don't study too hard yeah, just chill around this week. i don't want to be too left behind. tskk.

eee. i dunt wanna go to camppp. actually i want to. but but. arghh. i'm not making sense. *runs around... whoooohooo. camp. hopperty-hopp. bloiiink! oooh.*

here i come ubin. kay now, u kids be good yah. don't miss me :P

diiiiyyyaaaanaaaa. squeals!

Tips when going out wif ur mum

2004-09-04T21:51:00.000-07:00

Tips when going our wif ur mum

Tip No.0
When she asks...Do u wanna follow me to da supermarket after my work?...It’s nt reallie a matter of choice. Juz sae...yeah okae...nething is fine

Tip No.1
Never ever be late when u have to meet her after her working hours

Tip No.2
Always smile at her friends. Yesh juz fake it. Oh yah, when she smiles at u. juz smile back

Tip No.3
When she says we’re going somewhere u have never heard of, juz pretend u noe where tt place is

Tip No.4
In da bus, dun complain bout nething at all

Tip No.5
Always tap ur ez-link when leaving da bus or else she’ll make a big fuss bout it

Tip No.6
When she asks u wad u wanna eat, reply her immediately. If not u will starve.

Tip No.7
Always show tt u are one smart ass or she will call u slegeh(sp?) I hate it when tt happens.

Tip No.8
When in a supermarket, follow her wherever she goes. Dun wander. She’ll boil if u do

Tip No.9
Never ever use ur hp in front of her. She probably juz check ur msgs n stuff

Tip No.10
Try ur best nt ta make her angry. If it happens juz shut da hell up when she keeps on nagging.

I hate ma mother but hey I still lurv her. ( She gave birth to me…)

Chocolates n Cookies
Nurul.

2004-08-26T06:00:00.000-07:00

me, diy, ain and nadiah left the cinema with smiles as wide as this. or wider.

getting him to pose was a challange!

yes that lil rascal eventually tore my ticket!

thirty. flirty. and thriving. how cool is 13 going on 30?

it made us teary. it made us laugh. hard. it made the girls behind us choke on their own oh-so-exaggerated-loud-and-hyena-like-giggles. that cracked us up even more. we all left the cinema gliding, as if listening to inner music. this movie was the euphoria that lifted our spirits. we deserved it after enduring a plethora of general crap.

owh the things that go all wrong when you do everything just to be popular and anything but you.
there Is a teeny-weeny twist. its lyk the cherry on top of the cake.

anyhooziez, im not a movie reviewer and i dont wana spoil the fun. if you want feel-good time, watch it. hand on heart, it will rock your buttocks!

xoxo
aisha

raiiiiiin. wheeee.

2004-08-25T04:20:00.000-07:00

I'm only, no scrap that, really happy when it rains. _insert glee_ Was bouyantly jumping into puddles. I was merrily skipping in the rain which came down in sheets, on the way home, when I saw a girl who couldn't be more than 9. She was in this really hottt raincoat. It reminded me of my old raincoat.

My day started positively horrible. I stepped onto some idiot's puke on the Parade Ground. When I was going to wash my shoe, I somehow pressed onto the shower's tap(??). I got into class drenched. English was the turn about and my day wasn't that bad at all.

I can't believe I actually lied down on the filthy floor. Did you know that 3e1 and 3e2 are the filthiest classes? Yes, as confirmed by the teachers.

Yes, they are smart. They can ace a test even with the book upside down. Bahh. -.0

Wheee. Who loves tha rain? We do!

Ooh. The sexy and my mane. Okay well not much difference to my hair, but it IS uglier. Grr. So difficult to tie it all up.

"I. Love. You..." Ah i know.

the monkeys. self-explanatory.

there was a bat hanging on the fan. hah yeah right.

Don't take life so seriously, you will most likely not survive. So, now that's the end of the simple times, and the begining of everything else.

diyy.

afraid of the dark?

2004-08-25T03:20:00.000-07:00

i read an article on the dark. n i was thinking, some people are afraid of the dark;others find it exciting. deres dis story i heard, once a wise man told his son, who had a deep set fear of the dark, to walk on a dark path that did not seem to lead anywhere. The son refused saying that strange and dangerous things would confront him in the dark. When the father insisted that he went, the boy ventured into the dark only to return immediately. he was screaming that there were many venomous snakes and phythons on that path. Then, the father led the son down the same path with a light and they discovered that the path was strewn with ropes. dats wad my pri skewl teacher told me when i was in lyke..urm pri 4? ahh. the moral of this story is what people often fear is not the dark itself but what their active imaginations tell them is lurking in that dark place. personally, i do have a certain amount of fear of the dark because of my own silly passion for horror movies. so mentally, i associated the dark with evil.heh.

when im in the bedroom wit the curtains flapping in the wind, it did not bother me if the lights are on. whereas, when the same curtain flapped in the very same room in the dark,my heart leapt with fear although i was fully aware that there was nuthin to be afraid of. my active imagination further fuelled this baseless fear for i would visualise a woman crawling up into my bed.(like the ring?samara eh?hah) my onli cure then was to switch on the lights.yes ain ure tellin everyone wad a big scaredy cat u r.tsk tsk.

ok this is long. n y am i toking abt dis.ok tally ho!

i am afraid of the dark.heh
ain

2004-08-19T20:15:00.000-07:00

i finally found my way round this piece of shit we all call technology. so now im giving our blog its well deserved attention:)

the only (and i stress on the only) good thing about cme is that we go to the lab almost every week. so here i am, in the not-cold-at-all lab, "researching" on some lame thing no one would even bother to pretend to be interested in.

whats wrong with the air conditioners? more lyk.. whats wrong with the skewl. are we trying that desperately to save money for prime shit? then what are ministers for?

tests. that word would be sufficient to describe what this whole week is about. next week wont be any different. but.. i wont ever let them have the joy of knowing that they've accomplished what they intented to do. which is, to torture me to death. balls, its all balls.

i shan't bitch about skewl. we all know skewl is just downfuckingright evil. well, it could be worse.

bebes-de-bonbons.. any plans this saturday? wana go out? wana swim? wana work out? wana go to the gym? anything. anything at all..

i should, make the most out of whats left of this sucky yucky week

xoxo
aisha

2004-08-19T04:14:00.000-07:00

Today, in the bus. Fi and I couldn't stop laughing. Here's a hint; a domino affect.
I didn't complete any questions on Functions. I left it all halfway. I didn't sketch a single graph. I would never be able to look at Mrs Koh's face again. I'm so ashamed. I'm such a dumb wuss. I really have a love-and-hate relationship going on with the damn school. But school's so bad these days, that even Boot Camp seems like a party. Riiight.

Some boys, from 3e2 created a rocket with the sparklers. They said it exploded. Darn, I missed it. I could have enjoyed the sight and the shock when the sparklers blasted. Then maybe I could have pretended to shriek and jump on Danial if he's around. Bwahaha. A sad fact about 3e2 is that there's no cute malay guys. The chinese guys are fine. Danial is super fine. On the positive side to the sad fact, no distractions. Riiiight.

I get very turned on by smart guys. I had a talk with this dude, and we were whining about our life. It's so easy to talk to strangers I realised. So we were wondering about what it would have been if we made a right turn, instead of left. If we could have been someone different. Then we went from that to how we yearn for simpler days, but no part of life is easy. Our "teenhood" is a total blunder; "adulthood" is a predictable struggle; and when we're aged it's regret.
Life. So issit just a multiple choice question? Definitely it's much more easy theory wise than practical. A true or false/ right or wrong test? Our Conclusion: Hate to tell you this, but it's a life-long essay. Riiight.

Do.It.Yourself. (hah?)
diy.

2004-08-17T07:16:00.000-07:00

A typical Tuesday. A day that I can hardly recall by the next 3 days.

I woke up in the morning. Put on my smile, the only make-up i use. Sat for Physics test, which I'm sure to fail. Then there was English. The only class which I sit up straight. We played this "game". Pass the Parcel cum Speak Out. 15 sec to digest the topic, and talk about it in a min without a pause longer than 5 sec. The excitement/nervousness/whutever-you-call-that-feeling when the ball comes to you. The relieve yet small disappointment when the ball stops at a friend-next-to-you. The hoot when you see your friend's ass wriggling at a forfeit.
Despite the unsightly, peek-a-boo butt-crack, I love the whole idea.

Had lunch at KFC with Aisha, Fi and Ain. 4 hours of a marathon conversation. God, are we pros at talking or what? Haha. But sometimes you have to think twice before telling someone a secret. For that someone has a friend ;)(Not that I don't trust you guys or anything!) Oh we could have continued, if time would have allowed us.

A typical Tuesday indeed. I only remember the things we did for awhile, but I assure you, I'll remember who I did em with for a very very long time.

~~"Best friends hang tough. They are not packed in a box with 'Fragile' stickers and are not easily scared off, or ticked off. Best friends help you out whenever they can, make time for you even when they don't have any, and trust your friendship enough to say 'no'. Best friends are cross-your-heart-and-hope-to-die, good-times-and-bad-times, borrow-anything, tell-you-everything, trust-you-with-their-deepest-darkest-secrets, always-and-forever."~~

im so shagged,
diyy.

and the reason is you-ooo.

2004-08-14T21:58:00.000-07:00

By virtue of my impeccable taste and infallible judgements. *wriggle eyebrows*

The Pasir Ris Idol. Nothing spicy, but it gave a new meaning to "The Reason" _insert innocent smile_. Nix well deserved the standing ovation. It all goes down to the vocals really. If he/she can sing, then it will smooth out the whole band's performance. My throat was slightly sore at the end of it. Yes my bad, for screaming(earsplitting cheer, if you prefer) rather unnecessarily at times.

I have decided just 2 minutes ago, that I will post school-relevant stuff or anything I did with some schoolmates over here. And my screwed thoughts in my own blog.

So, since our assholic DM who keeps whistling annoyingly is a very well-known and common foe in PRSS, I shall channel my boredom to him as a topic. The term "asshole" is a strong label to hang around someone. Of course I'm only using the term with tongue-in-cheek. I don't hate him. He can be quite a jocular. And without a doubt I applaud him, for being so fit even though he's close to his declining years. However, I find the fact that he punished Swee Siong and friends for a very inoffensive act real dumb. Why there were punished can be even described as ludicrous. My, they weren't even in their school uniform to begin with. They were in their home tees and pe shorts, I heard frm Ernest. Seriously, like what is wrong with lying down on the field with your friends, waiting for the stars? They are all guys, not even in any hanky-panky business with their girlfriends. Mr Poh is right, it's quite romantic. *smiles* Btw Sir, you were jogging,not driving. I can't find a logical reason as to why you would want to fabricate that.

I shudder at the thought of being his child. Oh Goodness. I'm positive that idea would scare him too. So it goes both ways. His children are well brought up, too well brought up probably. His daughter better not believe in "Love is Blind" or "Looks(or size)does not matter". Yes, she better not even think of falling for an overweight guy no matter how smart, funny and loving he is. Her dad would chop him off. [Quote]: If my daughter bring home a boyfriend like this,(this- refering to an overweight guy) I would chop him off!![Unquote.]
Tsk2. His children probably look down and criticise people like Dixon. Pity. No wonder Dixon is always thinking of suicide. *shakes head*

Oops. I hope I did not break any school rules by expressing on how ridiculous our DM can be at times. We students are entitled to our opinions, are we not? Or issit an offence to not agree with the way the DM or his son thinks?

I love ow, not.
Diyy.

whoo hoo!

2004-08-14T03:31:00.000-07:00

so pasir ris idol was fun?yeahh.totally. im glad i came. ohh mr poh was oh so hot todae. goofy ah he. n his comments were super lame? some ah. n hydil's band totally rocks. power seh. so smooth. mm hmm. i looikee. rhadji's band was pretty good too. aisyah n the gang.. sexeh! it was hot. choreograhy pretty well done. i didnt noe safwan cld dance. yes yes. n dere was dis gerl who sang a mariah carey song. all by herself. it took guts mahn. n her voice was good. uh huh. a bunch of cuties. chinese grp lahh. overall, i still think NIX was ze best. yeahh. u dewds rock. k nuff said. tally ho!

ain

T.G.I.F

2004-08-12T23:59:00.000-07:00

Walking towards interchange. Underneath the scorching sun. T.G.I.F

Nurul: Mepek seh Mr Ow, budak tu nye skirt bukannye pendek sangat beh kene tangkap

Diy: Now THAT's what you call a short skirrt.

Fi: Ah ah seh tengok budak changkat (pointing)

Ain:Kembang seh skirt dorang!

Nurul: One of them tinggal kat ngan rumah aku. Tgk budak tampines sec nye skirt.

Diy: Ah. Budak tampines sec seme pendek2. (repeats self twice trying to make self heard)

All stare at the group with short skirts which fringed over their very nice legs further infront.
Unfortunately a different group of tpss girls who lacks height nearby looked up and stared at us. They teraser for they thought we were refering to their heights.

Our jaw dropped. We walked off laughing our heads off.

While waiting for bus to arrive.

"Ak ah pe! Budak tampines sec seme ketot2 pe!" *stare stare + jeling jeling* the group of girls who teraser.

Us: Hahahaha.

When an amazingly hideous guy waved his fat thick palm before Fi's face. A desperate who once trailed her home. Oh, please!

Diy&Nurul: ah. *look at each other awkwardly*
Desperate Ugly Guy: Asal sombong?
Fi: *stare at him irritatedly*
D.U.G: *came closer*
Fi: *shows a pissed face and inched away* Gi sane ah*shoo him off with a wave of a hand*

That fugly monster had a copper coloured thick wig-liked hair. His eyes were framed with HUGE thick black plastic specs underneath the most bushy eyebrows. Fi decided to come along to Nurul's house, fearing she will be stalked by the D.U.G again.

reflection for the day:
Nurul: Jangan terase!!
Klau muker dah mcm siak jgn nk tackle bdk sweet cam Fi!

Fi: *nods head* yarr true.true...jgn perasaan ar gerl...
juz two words GELI!!!!YUCKS!!!kau takde cermin kat rumah eh??

Diyy: Don't eavesdrop into our conversation no matter how intriguing it is. Busybodies.
*looks at fi* No mirror lah, the mirror cracked when he tried to check out his reflection.

Reminisce.

2004-08-12T06:03:00.000-07:00

Reminisce the hoots, reminisce the laughter. Reminisce the times when we were pissed with each other.

Reminisce the time we wish Mdm Hamida would give us water. Reminisce after watching They, running down the Exit passage-way in fear.

Reminisce the uneasiness, when a teacher says "Groups of FOUR". Reminisce the roar when me and aisha can't open the door.

Reminisce the period, going to TM to wonder. Reminisce the time Fi went "Error, Error!"

Reminisce Ain going batty and tickling our gelastic. Reminisce the nonsensical moments when we'll together from right move our feet.

Reminisce when we drag our feet from the bus stop seat. How Nurul will whine bout tuition and heat.

This life our symphony, and we are the lyrics. I love all you sweeties.

Diyy.
Hurhur. Gawd, i'm gettin lamer.

sharpen your claws

2004-08-12T05:32:00.000-07:00

bahh. all right the image is nt good. not proud of it. imma make sure the image is better when i get my com back. not a good start. but well we started.

so sweetykins. update the corner bout urself thurr ayte :D hah i wrote crap to fill it up fer tha time being.

ah. funny i've not touched blogger in loike a century. i don't really know how to use it. looks so much more sophisticated.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"take care..." you said.
i wanna tell you i miss you
i wanna be ur downass bitch.
i crave for you.
i don't mind you being possesive.
i wanna tell you i love you.
"alright cya arnd." i replied

i lost you while searching for me.
diyy.

dig me

2004-08-11T22:42:00.000-07:00

hey hey hey. anas is drivin me nuts. in mt class now, wit diy by my side. im tokin crap. ok bbbye!

im lovin u!
ain

Yeehaw!

2004-08-11T01:11:00.000-07:00

Boo Baby.
We rock. And you have to agree with us, cause you are here.

You know you love us,
aisha&diyy.